While we’d love for all our roommate relationships to be only sunshine and rainbows, sometimes conflicts are inevitable. Even if you’re living in a place like Stanza Living with people who share your vibe and interests, there are times when petty squabbles can crop up. Because sharing a living space with someone is an intimate experience, and it can lead to wires getting crossed. But instead of fostering pettiness, dissolving into passive aggressiveness or having an outright fight with your roommate or a fellow PG mate, it’s good to keep your cool. And these self-affirmations and reminders will help you stay grounded and find peace, even in the face of a conflict.
Identify your feelings
It’s alright to feel upset, stressed or drained right after an argument with your roommate. Allow yourself to experience your emotions, but try not to let them govern your actions. If you decide to confront them immediately, you might act rashly or cruelly. Instead, give yourself time to process your thoughts. Remember that any negative feelings you’re experiencing only affect you, not your roommate. Once you’ve identified your feelings (and how they were triggered), you’ll be able to move past the incident much more quickly.
Don’t hold onto anger or guilt
Arguing with your roommate about whose turn it was to empty the dustbin probably isn’t worth losing your friendship over. And it’s not worth stewing in resentment either. You should choose the path of forgiveness and reconciliation instead. Even if the conflict with your roommate is about something more serious than household chores, forgiving them will free you from feeling like a victim and allow you to let go of the anger much more quickly. And if it was you that made a mistake, go ahead and apologise instead of languishing in guilt for days. A genuine apology can go a long way towards repairing the damage of a conflict with your roommate.
Avoid gossiping about it
Yes, we know that your first instinct after a fight might be to call your friend and gossip about it, but that’s something you should definitely avoid doing. Because gossip has a way of getting out of hand. You never know when what you say in the heat of the moment could get back to your roommate and further aggravate the situation. Especially if you’re choosing to discuss your argument with other roommates or those who live in the same hostel or PG. Remember, with such actions, you could be creating an awkward living situation for yourself and your roommate for the foreseeable future. That’s why, it’s better not to discuss the conflict until you’ve had a chance to calm down.
Communicate with your roommate
So you’ve had a fight with your roommate. Give each other some breathing room for a while but make sure you make an attempt to talk to them about it. This will prevent any future miscommunication or passive aggressiveness from occurring. Having a polite but frank conversation can go a long way to mending any hurt sentiments and clearing the air between you. Remember that you probably will still be living with your roommate, so it’s best to discuss any concerns openly. Especially if your argument is over something that could recur in the future like splitting rent or utility bills, or household chores. Negotiating how you can deal with these in the future can prevent a lot of ugliness down the road.
It’s okay to compromise
You and your roommate may be sharing a room in a women’s PG in Madhapur, but you’re two very different people. And having a harmonious relationship while you live together will involve a fair amount of compromise. Often, conflicts are a sign of the absence of consideration. Talking to your roommate will help you figure out how you can accommodate their needs and vice versa. If you’re both willing to meet in the middle, you’ll have a lot less to argue about.
So, there you have it. Conflicts with roommates are a very natural part of living with others, but if you deal with them correctly you can emerge with your relationships still intact. So, don’t get overwhelmed by your emotions and treat others with kindness. These reminders will help you stay composed and hold onto your peace.